Help (Regarding John the Bachelor)

John The Bachelor was so called only because he had never been married, and not because he embodied the ideal of bachelorhood, at least not the ideal commonly held by those living on his street, the very people who referred to him each day, even in his presence, as John The Bachelor. Everyone knew everyone else on John The Bachelor’s street, and it was not uncommon for one neighbor to in some way, without agenda or expectation, offer help to another.  If someone was raking leaves, for example, they might spend a few extra minutes raking the leaves from the side yard of their next-door-neighbor’s home.  This sort of thing happened all the time.  But when John The Bachelor raked leaves, he would often take it upon himself to rake the entire yard of the home next to his.  Following that, in the interest of fairness and to avoid any hurt feelings, he would rake the opposite neighbor’s yard as well.  And if, while raking either yard, he noticed a rebel tree branch growing askew from the rest, he would happily skip home to retrieve his hedge shears (or, in the case of taller trees, his telescoping pruner).  When John The Bachelor raked leaves, it required most of the weekend and usually led to the careful manicuring of every lawn on the block…..Read the whole story.

Stars (Regarding Laura Klein)

It was well known throughout their neighborhood that Laura Klein’s husband, Richard (though he preferred Rich), slapped his wife once in a while.  It happened every few months, when he bounced a check or failed to unclog the sink, or when his temper flared for some other reason unknown to his wife or himself.  Most of their neighbors’ conversations regarding the couple found their end with one of the parties involved saying, “She lets him hit her, ya know?” and this seemed to explain away any number of unusual behaviors exhibited by the woman.  Mrs. Klein’s neighbors thought there was no way to anticipate what a woman who remained loyal to an irregularly violent man might do.…Read the whole story.

Houses (Regarding Daniel Denis)

Daniel Denis was in love with the world.  Since the day his eyes first fluttered open, he had looked with wide wonder at the dullness of the everyday.  He and his parents, Adam and Lara Denis, lived in a modest three-bedroom home at the end of their block, from the roof of which Daniel could look out at the parallel rows of houses stretching north to the street’s end.  In the dark of the early morning, while his parents still slept, Daniel would often climb up to the highest point of the roof and scan the dense shadows of his neighborhood, inventing wild fantasies from the shapes his tightly scrunched eyes made out.  He imagined many things while perched there, but he most often pictured his neighbors’ homes as…Read the whole story.

Coming Next Month…

Fear (Regarding Anthony Ray)

Anthony Ray was a known liar.  He never did so with malicious or cruel intent, rather he chose dishonesty only because the truth was of little importance to him.  Anthony gave personal accomplishments, the quality of anecdotes, first impressions, and avoidance of responsibility all a higher priority than honesty.  He could and would lie to anyone about pretty much anything – places he had gone, people he had met, even meals he had eaten.  He would frequently lie about his height, blatantly exaggerating by several inches.  Once, while discussing a trip to Russia that he and his family had never taken, he marked climbing the north face of the Matterhorn as the highlight of the trip.  On another occasion, after claiming to have been a contestant on an unaired episode of Wheel of Fortune, Anthony went on and on about Alex Trebek’s terrible off-camera temper.  It’s fair to say that Anthony Ray, while quite the experienced liar, was not a particularly good one… Check back next month to read the rest of the story.